


Her king

by Gandalfgirl579



Category: King of Scars - Fandom, Nikolai Series - Leigh Bardugo, The Grisha Trilogy - Leigh Bardugo
Genre: Angst, Comedy, Domestic, Domestic Fluff, Drabble Collection, Drama, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Jealousy, Love Confessions, Romance, post-kos
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-09-17
Updated: 2020-10-01
Packaged: 2021-03-07 19:41:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 865
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26513101
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gandalfgirl579/pseuds/Gandalfgirl579
Summary: She didn't kiss him--She didn't deserve to.A collection of Zoyalai angst, because what could be better?
Relationships: Nikolai Lantsov/Zoya Nazyalensky
Comments: 8
Kudos: 39





	1. Chapter 1

This was beyond stupid, Zoya knew.

She was a general, yes, but she had no right to be this close to Nikolai, this close to her king.

It had been mere hours since they had returned to the palace, and even without Genya's sleeping draught, Nikolai had fallen asleep as soon as his head hit the pillow.

The most pressing threat to the crown had been dealt with, and yet Zoya could not bring herself to leave his side.

So she sat on the edge of his bed, watching him sleep, peaceful for the first time in ages. His hair was wild, his chest bare, his pretty lips parted. How she wanted to kiss him.

She didn't kiss him-- _She didn't deserve to._

Soon, though, she knew she would never have the chance again.

Nikolai-- _Her Nikolai--_ would soon be Ehri's.

The thought made her heart ache.

Moving slowly, carefully, she laid down beside him. He smelled of sweat and blood and sand, and she breathed him in.

Oh, but what was a General to do? What was _a Grisha_ to do? What was _**a dragon**_ to do?

What was all her power worth, if she lost her king?

Though she hesitated, Zoya pressed her hand to his chest, over his heart, over the star-shaped scar that had nearly been the death of him.

He hummed at the touch, stirred a bit, but did not wake.

She hadn't lost him then, Zoya told herself. She wouldn't lose him now.


	2. Chapter 2

"You were in love with her, weren't you?" Zoya's voice was soft in the night air, nearly drowned out by the crackling of the fireplace. 

And he had so been enjoying the quiet. "Who?" Nikolai asked, stupidly.

" _Alina_." Zoya said the name as if it were an obscenity. 

Nikolai, stretched out on his enormous bed, miraculously unbound, said simply, "No." It was said too quickly to be convincing.

Zoya raised a manicured brow at him. She sat on the edge of the bed, her torso twisted so she could look him in the eyes. Her own eyes, usually so blue, were nearly black in the low light. "Are you still?" she asked. The answer she wanted was clear.

"I don't think I ever was." Nikolai stared at the canopy over the bed as he spoke, his fingers interlaced over the star-shaped scar where the thorn had pierced him all those months ago. Though it had been healed long ago, it ached. Or was that his heart itself aching? "I liked her," he said, slowly, "and it hurt when she left, but I don't think I loved her."

"Nikolai." The name came gently, softly, nothing like the stern tone she usually used on him. She sounded hurt, more so than he had ever heard. He bit his lip. "You know you can't lie to me."

Staring out the window, watching the stars wheel past, Nikolai said, not the least bit sure of himself. "I can try."

"It's probably best to forget about her," Zoya said, ever practical. "She's--"

He cut her off, saying, "You know I love--"

"Don't say it." 

But he was stubborn, and he said, meaning every word, "You know I love you, Zoya."

"And yet it changes nothing." He had never heard her sound so defeated. It was utterly wrong. She deflected, asking, "Shouldn't you be thinking about Ehri? You're marrying her, aren't you?"

Nikolai didn't hesitate to point out, "You sound jealous."

Softly, Zoya admitted, "I am."


	3. Chapter 3

“Zoya!” She rarely heard him sounding so desperate, and Zoya took off down the corridor of the palace towards Nikolai’s bedroom. “Zoya!” he shouted again. “Come quick!”

When she came racing into the room, he was standing on his bed, eyes wild, searching the floor.

“What is it?” she asked, panting and fighting panic.

“It’s under the bed!”

Zoya rolled her eyes, then dropped to her knees at the foot of the bed. There was nothing under the bed at all. She huffed, then straightened, putting her hands on her hips and giving him a dirty look. “There’s nothing,” she said coolly.

Nikolai, too, dropped to his knees, crawling to the edge of the bed. “There’s a spider,” he said. “It was huge! Nearly as big as me!”

Though Zoya sneered, she asked just the same, “Was it wearing a suit?”

“I only saw it for a minute,” Nikolai said. Slowly, cautiously, he bent over the edge of the bed, his golden curls nearly touching the floor as he turned himself upside-down. “It may well have been wearing one.”

Beside him, Zoya bent, too.

The beast soon appeared: It was a daddy long legs, no bigger than a coin.

Reaching out, Zoya let it climb onto her fingers, and Nikolai reared back when she pulled it out from under the bed. “He’s harmless,” she said. She rose as carefully as she could, crossing the room to the window. “Come open this for me,” she called.

Though he hesitated, Nikolai did as he was told, opening the window so that Zoya could let the spider skitter off her fingers and onto the exterior wall of the palace. “My ruthless Zoya,” he said in awe, “doesn’t kill spiders?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Holy wow, it's a happy chapter! Also, hey, shoot me an ask if you have any requests or prompts for this ship!

**Author's Note:**

> I'm not sure if this is the start of something, or if this will be my only King of Scars fic, but I must admit I'd like to write more! This ship is my absolute favorite!
> 
> As always, I must mention that I go by [TheStarless1](http://thestarless1.tumblr.com/) over on Tumblr, and I'm totally open to taking questions and comments and requests and prompts there! :) Hit me up!


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